The Only Remedy to My Sinful Anger

I have often had a problem with my temper. After an outburst filled with regret, I couldn’t help but think what I could have done to prevent myself from being that angry in the first place. Should I have prayed more? Should I have lived a more saintly life?

But each thought fills me only with more anger, anger for myself. Sometimes, I fall more into sin whenever the thought of God being angry at me enters my mind. How disappointed must He have been with me and with what I have done!

Such thoughts, however, never help. They only contribute to my feeling of despair and hopelessness.

On the other hand, one thing I’ve realized that helps is the thought of the gentleness of Jesus.

“I had to conclude that God’s mercy and forgiveness have nothing to do with Divine wrath; instead, mercy and grace diminish human wrath and gradually destroy it.” - Julian of Norwich (All Shall Be Well: A Modern-Language Version of the Revelation of Julian of Norwich by Ellyn Sanna)

I remember one of the images of Jesus that I saw in my mind’s eye (click here to read more). How friendly and sweet He was. How gentle, kind and warm. With this image of Jesus in mind, my anger slowly melts away. It is this vision alone that could help me put out my own unjust wrath. Not God’s anger. Not fear of hell. But the kind and tender face of Jesus who loves me and desires my good.

I need to keep this in mind. For what else but God’s soft whisper could calm my harshness? What else but God’s tenderness could cool down my wild temper? It is His gentleness alone that could remind me of what is good. It is His love for me alone that can call me back from hatred.

“...it would be impossible for God to be filled with vengeful wrath. I saw that our lives are grounded and rooted in love; without love, we would not be alive. When grace allows us to look into the amazing Divine Goodness, we see we are endlessly made one with God in love and it is impossible that anger separate us from Divine Love. For wrath and friendship are opposite forces. How could the One who erases and heals our angry arrogance, making us gentle and humble, be anything but unified in love, all gentleness and humility, which is the opposite of wrath.” - Julian of Norwich (All Shall Be Well: A Modern-Language Version of the Revelation of Julian of Norwich by Ellyn Sanna)