Why the Single Life Is Also a Call To Love

What is a vocation?

To some, it is a state of life. To others, it is a mission we must accomplish here on earth. But if we ever consider a vocation as God’s calling, I think that we can define it simply as a call to love.

Perhaps this is one reason why many can’t accept the single life as a vocation. Because how can it be a call to love?

We can easily understand marriage in this sense because it is a call to love another person and to form a family, to bear children out of that love. We can also understand the religious life as a vocation because it is a call to love God and neighbor in such a way as to make a permanent vow of celibacy so that one can best fulfill that call.

But how about the single life? How could it ever be considered a call to love?

I must admit that I have failed to see this before. When I was younger, I only considered two paths. One is marriage, and the other one is the religious life. It was only later on that I began to realize how God can call us in diverse and unique paths.

My calling came in stages.

And it was revealed to me along with my mission to spread the Good News through writing.

When I look back, however, I realized that this desire had always been there in my heart. And no, it was not the desire to be single for life. But it was the desire to love and serve God in a unique way.

I remember how this desire became more clear as I learned about Mother Teresa’s mission for the poorest of the poor. When I was young, she was considered to be a living saint! If you asked anyone about what holiness is like, one can certainly point to her life and they would know.

I wanted to serve the poor also, but in a different way.

Instead of serving only those who are poor financially or physically, I wanted to serve those who are poor in love.

Mother Teresa herself recognized this and expressed it in many ways:

“Loneliness and the feeling of being unwanted is the most terrible poverty.”

“We think sometimes that poverty is only being hungry, naked and homeless. The poverty of being unwanted, unloved and uncared for is the greatest poverty.”

“The greatest disease in the West today is not TB or leprosy; it is being unwanted, unloved, and uncared for. We can cure physical diseases with medicine, but the only cure for loneliness, despair, and hopelessness is love. There are many in the world who are dying for a piece of bread but there are many more dying for a little love. The poverty in the West is a different kind of poverty -- it is not only a poverty of loneliness but also of spirituality. There's a hunger for love, as there is a hunger for God.”

In my heart, I wanted to be a part of those who could satiate this hunger. And although I also yearned for a family, this desire in my heart goes beyond even that.

Now some people may ask why I didn’t just join a religious order for that. Out of so many religious communities, there must be one that could respond similarly to this call.

I did search somehow. Yet I did not find any during that time that could lead me to the fulfillment of the same desire I had.

The single life was the life that I found where I could be most free to respond to this call.

It may not be as grand as starting a new order or joining the likes of the Dominicans or the Paulines. But it is a simple life that can fulfill this unique call to love.

In my article “When God Called Me To Be a Writer”, I described more about what this calling looked like.

I also shared the Bible verse that served as my inspiration for each task:

“Comfort, give comfort to my people, says your God.” – Isaiah 40, NAB

The world is filled with lost, empty and lonely souls. And although the world is filled with so much noise and amusement, none could ever comfort the heart that thirsts for the love of God.

And so I wrote for those who were poor in love. To those who were in despair and looking for a little light of hope.

My first blog was also dedicated for those who wanted someone to listen and pray for them. I accepted emails and responded the best I could to extend God’s comfort to all who may need it.

It is not that I have always been capable of the task. But it is the call that also refines me and equips me to accomplish His will.

The single life for me paved the way to answer this unique call to comfort those who suffer from the poverty of loneliness and being unloved.

Other people may have their own paths to responding to God’s call to love. It may not look exactly in the same way that we may have envisioned them, but I would like to believe that there are as many unique and beautiful calls as there are countless ways to love.

Learn more about my journey in discovering God’s call and learning about His love.

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