Why It’s Not Good for You To Respond To Harsh Critics Online

And the better alternative to responding to your bashers

Have you ever posted something that seemed so innocent and positive online but later on received the harshest kind of reply?

We’ve all experienced that moment of bewilderment for receiving a criticism or a judgment that came out of nowhere. In our minds, we wonder what we’ve done so terribly wrong. Did we deserve that kind of response?

Something just didn’t seem right. We wanted to let the other person know our side of the story. We wanted to let them know how wrong they were about us and how they hurt us. This seemed to be the only way for fairness to rule again in the world. And after that, we can have peace.

But did we?

What often happened was that despite our best efforts to explain our side, the other person still fails to get it.

Instead of understanding, we just experience more misunderstanding. And every word we say seems to be misinterpreted more and more. Whatever happened to logic, truth and fairness?

Sad to say, we can’t always get what we deserve in this life.

Even if you say the best words, they can be received as bad words by someone else. And no amount of effort on our side could ever convince them otherwise.

In trying to get the other person to acknowledge their faults, we just dwell on our hurts longer.

Our happiness and peace becomes dependent upon the person who has offended us. And if we say something wrong in return, we become guilty, too. We regret what we say and we blame ourselves in the process.

So what do we do?

Many times, the best way to address a harsh criticism is to simply remain silent.

Wasn’t that what Jesus did in the presence of Pilate?

“When he was accused by the chief priests and elders, he answered nothing. Then Pilate said to him, ‘Don’t you hear how many things they testify against you?’
He gave him no answer, not even one word, so that the governor marvelled greatly.”
- Matthew 27:12–14, WEBBE

Final Words

We can’t always control what other people think or say. But we can control how we respond and up to what extent we can allow the opinion of others to affect our lives.

It is important to win an argument. But it is more important to keep your peace of mind.

“I must not allow anything to disturb my interior calm and silence. Nothing can compare with peace of soul. When I am wrongfully accused of something, I will not explain myself...”
— St. Faustina (Divine Mercy In My Soul, 792)

“Why should we defend ourselves when we are misunderstood and misjudged? Let us leave that aside. Let us not say anything… O blessed silence, which gives so much peace to the soul!” — St. Therese of Lisieux

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